Posts tagged Surrender

More On Surrender and Feelings

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I’m getting reminders of the power in surrender.  When we have courage and feel the feelings, painful though they may be, we allow ourselves to push through to the other side and we are stronger for it.

Douglas Bloch,in his book “Listening To Your InnerVoice,” says “You are like a diamond that is continually being polished and perfected. As this purification proceeds, old thought forms and negative patterns rise to the surface to be released. Past unfinished business must be completed. Old traumas that have been stored in the body ask to be discharged.”

This is so true for us all and a lovely way to see how the process works. We become more as God created us with each resurfacing of the past traumas and each polishing as we feel and push through the feelings. It can feel just awful, but it’s only temporary – “this too shall pass” – and then we are free of that layer and we can move forward unencumbered. It’s the only way to get to the other side, to push through the feelings. I’ve had my own to push through recently. In between feeling them, I did all sorts of decluttering – taking breaks to have some good cries. Otherwise, I was in much gratitude and positive. which seems to be in direct opposition to my other feelings, but there you have it. Guess I’ve been kind of like a bouncing ball of emotion lately. What I can appreciate is that the ball keeps moving and doesn’t stay stuck in the sadness or hurt for too long.  And that’s how it works – “One day at a time.”

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Affirmation for the Day – ” I feel my feelings and heal.”

Remember to say the affirmation at least 3 times whenever you remember it, preferably in front of a mirror.

Course In Miracles Lesson – All things are lessons God would have me learn.  Forgive and I will see this differently.

Practice – All things are lessons God would have me learn.  Forgive and you will see this differently.  I forgive and this will disappear.

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Not Taking The Bait

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Alanon and AA teach us to refocus on ourselves, our behaviors, our motivations and ask – ” What’s my part in this? ”  Instead of lambasting our loved ones, doing what hasn’t worked in the past, we get to use new tools to deal with our difficult situations. 

Instead of taking the bait and getting into fights we can pick up the phone and call our sponsor or someone else on our phone list and talk about us and how we’re feeling.  We can leave the house and go for a walk, say the Serenity Prayer, clean, read the Big Book or How Alanon Works, go to a meeting, meet a fellow Alanon or AA member for coffee.

When we keep our focus on ourselves, and off the alcoholic or the codependent we begin to grow.  We learn in increments about detachment, accountability for ourselves, respect and dignity for us and the other person, and we actually start to feel better because we are keeping our eyes on our own business.  In most cases, the alcoholic or codependent and their issues are not our business.  Other people in general are not our business.  They can handle their own challenges.  We needn’t run to anyone’s rescue.  We do need to take care of ourselves –  be responsible for paying our bills, getting to the doctor and dentist, cleaning our home, going to our job and doing it well, going to Alanon meetings, working with our sponsor on the 12 Steps, eating, sleeping and keeping ourselves fit to be of maximum service to God.  It’s simple.  Not always easy, but definitely simple.  It leads to sanity and serenity – progress.  And if we need help, we always have the support of other AA and Alanon members.

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Affirmation for the Day – ” I am willing to change.  I am willing to do new things.  I can do it.”

Remember to say the affirmation at least 3 times whenever you remember it, preferably in front of a mirror.

Course In Miracles Lesson – I want the peace of God

Practice – I want the peace of God.

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Surrender

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There is power in surrender.  When I first heard that, it made no sense to me.  Not at all.  It seemed counter intuitive, so to speak.  

On page 58 in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous we are told that we will find no results of the positive, successful type by using our old ideas.   “The result was nil until we let go absolutely.”  That means we surrender to the fact – yes, the fact – that we don’t know what’s best for us or anyone else.  We wouldn’t have ended up in a 12 Step meeting if we could figure out how to deal with addiction and codependency.  And it’s okay.  The disease of alcoholism is cunning, baffling and powerful.  Remember.  Those are daunting descriptions.  How could we possibly make healing progress on our own?

Okay, so that being said we must let go, and let God go to work through the 12 Steps and the people in meetings.  It’s so much easier, and it was such a relief to me eventually.  I came to meetings desperate enough to be willing to do what I was told to do.  The people in these meetings seemed happy.  I wanted what they had and was finally “willing to go to any lengths,” as it also says on page 58.  And so the journey started and, a day at a time, my life began to change for the better.  Progress was made in increments, daily.  Even without knowing it, my Higher Power was doing for me what I could not do for myself.   And that’s how it works for all of us.  It continues to work every day that we turn it over, get into acceptance, and do what is in front of us to do.  It works, when we work it.  So keep coming back.

     – If you find this helpful, pass it on to others.  For daily updates, press the orange RSS feed to the right for directions.

Affirmation for the Day – ” I am willing to change.  I am willing to try new things.”

Remember to say the affirmation at least 3 times whenever you remember it, preferably in front of a mirror.

Course In Miracles Lesson – I trust my sisters and brothers who are one with me

Practice – It is not this that I would look upon.  I trust my sisters and my brothers who are one with me.

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